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Should a ten-year-old be able to ride her bike around the neighborhood without supervision? Can a fourteen-year-old rebuff the advances of a middle-aged person? Questions like these can help parents decide how to protect their children when involved in social activities with friends.
It is hard to know when kids are old enough to play outdoors alone, whether in their yard or racing down the block on a skateboard. Police cases abound where children of both genders and all ages have been abducted from their neighborhoods or even their own homes. Here are a few tips for advising children about personal safety while engaged in social activities:
1. Teach children to avoid strangers. A universal rule from generations past, this one takes on renewed significance because unknown assailants can approach from many avenues like the skating rink, the playground, or the computer. If your children play at a neighbor's house, instruct them not to let someone they don't know touch, bribe, or hurt them in any way. In fact, be sure that you know who will be supervising the kids, whether they are playing on the swings or having a teenage get-together.
2. Remind kids to obey rules. Whether it's another parent's curfew for your child's friend or a traffic law that applies to everyone, children need to be taught to abide by an authority's guidelines. Let them know if you find out about wrong-doing while away from your watchful eyes, you will impose additional punishment to anything they receive elsewhere. Don't make exceptions or cover for them if they break the law. They have to learn to take responsibility for themselves, and part of that is seeking safety through the sanctity of protective rules.
3. Provide a safety net. When your kids go out with their friends to a school function or a neighborhood party, provide change for a telephone call or taxi money home. You don't want a child of any age to be stranded without access to a public phone or transportation. Tell them how to find these things in the event a friend's car breaks down or an accident occurs.
4. Reinforce moral training. Children need to be taught right from wrong. Avoid the temptation of teaching moral relativism that suggests there are no absolute truths, because then kids will feel free to do whatever they wish in the name of personal freedom. Spiritual guidelines should be enforced from the time they are young children, so when the mature to the point of socializing with friends, they will know how to make smart and safe decisions.
5. Check on them. Keep an eye on children playing in the back yard. Drive by a party where your son or daughter is supposed to be and see if you can spot the family car parked nearby. Shop the mall at the same time your teen wants to cruise with friends and agree to meet somewhere inside so you can semi-monitor their activities. Kids of all ages yearn for boundaries, which help them feel safe and protected. While you don't want to smother them, an occasional check-up is good for parents and children.
Safety is the parents' responsibility for kids who have not yet reached legal maturity. Be sure to look out for your children when they start hanging out with friends in a variety of social situations. |
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